Monday 9 November 2015

Story #76 - Such an asshole


"Have I told you how much of an asshole you are?"
"Every day we meet. I gave you my number last week and you've been texting me, too."
"Because you are."
"If I really was, I wouldn't have given you my number."
"I think you gave it because you like being called one."
"Right."
"So what makes me one?"
"You being yourself."
"Uh-huh. And you're not?"
"No."
"Why?"
"I'm well-mannered."
"You don't seem to have a problem with cursing me out."
"That's different."
"How do you figure?"
"An asshole needs to be called out by the nice guy."
"Oh, so you're a nice guy. You still haven't told me what differentiates you from me."
"Err..."
"You wanted to hang out, so I gave you my number. You keep calling me names and I don't reply back. I don't insult anyone, whereas you do. I usually compliment people daily, whereas you make fun of their blemishes or apparel."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"That's why you're an asshole. You say the truth."
"You have a weird logic."
"Probably."

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